One Great Love

"The One Great Love (from salon.com)

Some people -- it is not certain if they are the lucky ones or the unlucky ones -- have had One Great Love; a love whose intensity and mutuality allowed no doubt that it was the real thing; a love that never lost its quality of strangeness; a love that, years later, still makes the throat catch when it's remembered; a love whose unfolding remolded the selves of both people, as when a graft on a branch forms a new tree. In some cases -- may they be happy! -- these couples stay together. In others, the couple resist the graft, spooked by the power of the enchantment that entwined them, or disliking the new hybrid. They separate, and the separation is damaging; it is like surgery. The two people stagger off their separate ways, unentwined, fiercely seeking to resume their prior independence, but it cannot be fully restored. They retain the twists of the joint self they formed against the now-absent other half. "

I guess most of us have heard about this One Great Love. According to the excerpt above, your one love who still gives you a lump in your throat whenever he/she's remembered. I for one have that one great love who still "haunts" me.
It's been more than two years since I broke up with my long time boyfriend but everytime I see, smell or hear anything that can be associated with him, I feel this certain pang of regret and longing. Regret because I still have those what if's and what could've been's... Longing because I still imagine myself being with this person.
For the past weeks, I have been dreaming about my one great love and have been missing him so much... for reasons I can't explain. Is it maybe because I'm still single and he's married? Or is it because I just miss him? I really don't know... Could it be that he also misses me? I don't want to consider that idea because I know that he doesn't.
I really hate what I'm feeling right now but it seems that everything around me reminds me of him (even the guy I always see at the shuttle terminal). It's as if I'm going through the pain again... As if the break up is fresh and I'm (again) in the process of moving on... I was thinking, how can I really move on if until now it's him and him only...???