Thursday, August 14, 2008

The One Who Got Away...

The One Who Got Away
In your life, you'll make note of a lot ofpeople. Ones with whom you Shared something special, ones who will always mean something. There's the one you first kissed, the one you firstloved, the one you lost yourvirginity to, the one you put on a pedestal, theone you're with... andthe one that got away.
Who is the one that got away? I guess it's thatperson with whoeverything was great, everything was perfect,but the timing was just wrong.There was no fault in the person, there was noflaw in the chemistry,but the cards just didn't fall the right way, Isuppose.
I believe in the fact that ending up withsomeone, finding a longtimepartner that is, does not lie merely in theother person. I can actuallyargue that an equal part, or maybe even thegreater part, has to dowith the matter of timing. It has to do with youbeing ready to settledown and comm! it to someone in a way that goesbeyond the little nicetiesof giddy romance.
How often have you gone through it without evenrealizing it? Whenyou're not ready to commit in that maturemanner, it doesn't matter whoyou're with, it just doesn't work. Smallproblems become big;inconsequentials become dealbreakers simplybecause you're not ready and it shows.It's not that you and the person you're with areno good; it's justthat it's not yet right, and little thingsbecome the flashpoint of thatfact.
Then one day you're ready. You really are. Andwhen this happens you'llbe ready to settle down with someone. He or shemay not be the mostperfect, they might not be the brightest star ofromance to ever haveburned in your life, but it'll work becauseyou're ready. It'll workbecause it's the right time and you'll make itwork. And it'll make sense,it really will.
So that day comes when! you're finally makingsense of things, and youfind yourself to be a different person. Thingsare different, yourapproach is different, you finally understandwho you are and what you want,and you've become ready because the time hastruly arrived. And mindyou, there's no telling when this day will come.Hopefully you're singlebut you could be in a long-term relationship,you could be married withthree kids, it doesn't matter. All you know isthat you've changed, andfor some reason, the one that got away, is thefirst person you thinkabout.
You'll think about them because you'llwonder, "What if they were heretoday?" You'll wonder, "What if we were togethernow, with me as I amand not as I was?" That's what the one that gotaway is. The biggest"What if?" you'll have in your life.
If you're married, you'll just have to acceptthe fact that the onethat got away, got away. Believe me, no matterhow fairy tale you thinkyour marriage is, this can happen to the best ofus. But hopefully you'remature enough to realize that you're alreadywith the one you're withand this is just another test of yourcommitment, one which will juststrengthen your marriage when you get past it.Sure, you'll think abouthim/her every so often, but it's alright. It'snever nice to live with a"might have been," but it happens.
Maybe the one that got away is the one who'salready married. In whichcase it's the same thing. You just have toaccept and know that yourmemories of that person will probably bring anice little smile to yourlips in the future when you're old and gray andreminiscing.
But if neither of that is the case, then it'sdifferent. What do you doif it's not yet too late? Simple...find him,find her. Because the veryexistence of a "one that got away" means thatyou'll always wonder,that if you got that one?
Ask him out to coffee, ask her out to a movie,it doesn't matter ifyou've dropped in from out of nowhere. You'd be surprised, you just mightbe "the one that got away" as well for theperson who is your "the onethat got away."
You might drop in from out of nowhere and itwon't make a difference.If the timing is finally right, it'll all justfall into place somehowand you know, I'm thinking, it would be a greatfeeling, in the end, tobe able to say to someone, "Hey you, you're the one that ALMOST got away."